There seems to be utter confusion at all levels of government regarding the
foot-and-mouth crises. The only ones who seems to know what they are doing are
members of the military who has had to pick up the pieces of political bungling.
The foot-in-mouth disease still seems rife. The other day buried cattle had
to be dug up because the water supply was being contaminated. A government spokesman
was saying there was no cause for concern, as it was not getting into the public
water supply. Only some farmers were affected, (but of course they are not expected
to vote Labour anyway.)
New Labour seems as incompetent in handling the foot-and-mouth outbreak as
the Conservatives were at handling the BSE crisis. Is this because neither party
understand the countryside, or is it because politicians are unable to manage
anything?
The Glorious Leader, Tony Blair, was up in Yorkshire today to show that "the
Countryside is open for business". And where did he go? He visited York
and Leeds. It is becoming clear that for the government London is where it's
at; the countryside is the provincial cities and the rest is "land with
no purpose."
While he was at it, Blair was also showing that he's got his priorities right.
The military staff who is busy organizing the culling up in Cumbria had to travel
a hundred miles down to Leeds so they could be congratulated on doing a fine
job in time for the early evening news. The obvious moral is that nothing is
more important than a photo opportunity in the eyes of a politician.
As if we didn't have enough problems in this country we now have the worst
outbreak of tubercolosis since the war down in Leicester. According to the Health
Authority it has nothing to do with the fact that they stopped vaccinating 18
months ago because they run out of vaccine (or funding?).
The writing is on the wall for the Monarchy. The gutter press and the Labour
Party is in a frenzy after The Countess of Wessex fell for a newspaper sting
and said that "President" Blair doesn't understand the Countryside.
(Is this supposed to be news, by the way?) Blair is on record as being 100%
behind the Monarchy. Maybe so, but among the ministers pushing for a Republic
is Michael Meacher who wouldn't dream of even saying good morning to his wife
without checking with Blair if it is "on message"
The same Michael Meacher popped up on the telly the other day to repeat the
new Government mantra "the counteryside is open for business". One
can motor out for a barmeal at a country pub. And then one can motor back home
again. I presume that is what they do in Islington.
What is the point of Blair visiting the centre of York to promote rural Britain.
How many outbreaks of foot-and-mouth have there been at the Jorvik Viking Centre?
Letter in the Yorkshire Post.
Pity the poor organic farmer somewhere in Canada next to a field used by Monsanto
for a trial crop of genetically modified corn. Not only was his crop contaminated,
but Monsanta billed him for using their patented seed. When he refused to pay
he was taken to court and lost. The law is indeed an ass at times, but it seems
like the whole world is going bonkers.
People bribing the government is called corruption; the government bribing
the people is called democracy.
Politicians have thin skins and long memories.
Peter Smith, general secretary of the Association of Teachers and Lecturers.
It's like having Altzheimer's disease. Everyone knows you, and you don't know
anyone.
Tony Curtis on being a celebrity.
We had someone over for a meal the other day who gave us a long lecture on
food hygene. I was tempted to take out some of the rats I keep in the freezer
for Arthur, but as he had already finished eating (the guest,not Arthur) I don't
think he would have appriciated it.
Dogs look up to us.
Cats look down on us.
Pigs treat us as equals.
Winston Churchill.
The EU Pet passport will not be issued to ferrets which has upset more than
a few Yorkshire folks. The reason given was that ferrets are not vegitarians,
and are thus more likely to get rabies. It seems the Eurocrats are unaware that
cats and dogs are actually carnivores, too.
Cockerels have been greeting the sunrise since time began, but no more. Townies
moving out to the new estates in the villages have been complaining, and the
government has reacted with new regulations. Cockerels are now not allowed to
crow until 7:30 AM on weekdays and 9:30 AM on Sundays and Bank holidays.
Leeds City Council has re-acted with horror to the news that a teacher has written a non-political correct poem and read it to primary school students, who seem to have enjoyed it immensely. There can't be much happening in Leeds at the moment. Here is the poem.
Nothing tastes quite like a gerbil
The're small and tasty to eat
Morsels of sweet rodent protein
From whiskers to cute little feet!
You can bake them, roast them or fry
them
They grill nicely or you can have them en
croute
In garlic butter they are simply delicious
You can even serve them with fruit!
So you can keep your beef and your
chicken
Your lamb and ham on the bone
I'll have gerbils as my daily diet
And what more - I can breed them at
home!
Tony Langham
Jack Straw was on the telly yesterday to announce that police recruitment is
now up on an average 77% this year and in my neck of the wood actually 100%.
So we can now all sleep safely in our beds, then? Not quite. I had a word with
a copper I know, and yes, the local constabulary had recruited one person while
last year there was none. 100% up then. But at the same time 45 police officers
had to be taken off the beat in order to fill in forms for the government. Oh,
well; statistics are wonderful things.
We have just had reported a suspected case of foot-and-mouth in a human. When
will the mass culling start?
The Shadow Home Secretary Ann Widdecombe has put her foot in it. She actually
said on the telly that if some-one breaks into your house and you happen to
refuse to roll over dead, you should not automatically be arrested and hauled
before the magistrates. Horror. Outrage. All the usual suspect chimed in at
once. Granting that our Ann tends to be somewhere near the lunatic fringe of
politics, at times she does have a point.
If you are looking to the government for a solution, you haven't understood
the problem.
Latest up-date on human foot-and-mouth. More than 30 people has been tested
and we are told there is nothing to worry about; it is not foot-and-mouth. Sighs
of relief all around, but we haven't been told what it is, and no-one seems
to be asking.
"No one is thinking if everyone is thinking alike."
General George Patton jr.
A couple of the blokes I was at University with in Leeds in the late sixties
have been a lot in the news lately. One is Dr. Shipman which is presently serving
life in prison for 15 murders, though it is believed he actually managed to
see off around 300 people. The other is Jack Straw. I'm not sure who is the
scarier of the two.